Maji[N]ation v. 0.5
Would you like to react to this message? Create an account in a few clicks or log in to continue.


Maji[N]ation 0.5

 
HomePortalGallerySearchLatest imagesLive ChatDonateRegisterLog in

 

 the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever

Go down 
+2
Admin
akkiiistud
6 posters
Go to page : Previous  1, 2, 3, 4  Next
AuthorMessage
Goku
Admin
Admin
Goku


Number of posts : 184
Age : 30
Location : Pakistan
Registration date : 2008-03-03

the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever   the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 EmptySun Mar 09, 2008 6:45 am

Cessna: "Jones tower, Cessna 12345, student pilot, I am out of fuel."

Tower: "Roger Cessna 12345, reduce airspeed to best glide!! Do you have the airfield in sight?!?!!"

Cessna: "Uh ... tower, I am on the south ramp; I just want to know where the fuel truck is."
Back to top Go down
http://www.tafreehtedosti.page.tl
Goku
Admin
Admin
Goku


Number of posts : 184
Age : 30
Location : Pakistan
Registration date : 2008-03-03

the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever   the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 EmptySun Mar 09, 2008 6:46 am

A man speaks frantically into the phone, "My wife is pregnant, and her contractions are only two minutes apart!"

"Is this her first child?" the doctor queries.

"No, you idiot!" the man shouts. "This is her husband!"
Back to top Go down
http://www.tafreehtedosti.page.tl
Goku
Admin
Admin
Goku


Number of posts : 184
Age : 30
Location : Pakistan
Registration date : 2008-03-03

the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever   the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 EmptySun Mar 09, 2008 6:47 am

The psychology teacher had just finished a lecture on mental health and had proceeded to give an oral quiz to the students. Speaking specifically about manic depression, the teacher asked, "How would you diagnose a patient who walks back and forth screaming at the top of his lungs one minute, then sits in a chair weeping uncontrollably the next?"

A young man in the rear of the room raised his hand and answered, "A basketball coach?"
Back to top Go down
http://www.tafreehtedosti.page.tl
Goku
Admin
Admin
Goku


Number of posts : 184
Age : 30
Location : Pakistan
Registration date : 2008-03-03

the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever   the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 EmptySun Mar 09, 2008 6:48 am

Teacher: Why are you late, Joseph?

Joseph: Because of a sign down the road.

Teacher: What does a sign have to do with your being late?

Joseph: The sign said, "SCHOOL AHEAD. GO SLOW!"
Back to top Go down
http://www.tafreehtedosti.page.tl
Goku
Admin
Admin
Goku


Number of posts : 184
Age : 30
Location : Pakistan
Registration date : 2008-03-03

the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever   the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 EmptySun Mar 09, 2008 6:49 am

This dog, is dog, a dog, good dog, way dog, to dog, keep dog, an dog, idiot dog, busy dog, for dog, 20 dog, seconds dog!

Now read without the word dog.
Back to top Go down
http://www.tafreehtedosti.page.tl
Goku
Admin
Admin
Goku


Number of posts : 184
Age : 30
Location : Pakistan
Registration date : 2008-03-03

the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever   the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 EmptySun Mar 09, 2008 6:49 am

Physics Teacher: "Isaac Newton was sitting under a tree when an apple fell on his head and he discovered gravity. Isn't that wonderful?"

Student: "Yes sir, if he had been sitting in class looking at books like us, he wouldn't have discovered anything."
Back to top Go down
http://www.tafreehtedosti.page.tl
Goku
Admin
Admin
Goku


Number of posts : 184
Age : 30
Location : Pakistan
Registration date : 2008-03-03

the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever   the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 EmptySun Mar 09, 2008 6:51 am

The teacher of the earth science class was lecturing on map reading.

After explaining about latitude, longitude, degrees and minutes the teacher asked, "Suppose I asked you to meet me for lunch at 23 degrees, 4 minutes north latitude and 45 degrees, 15 minutes east longitude?"

After a confused silence, a voice volunteered, "I guess you'd be eating alone."
Back to top Go down
http://www.tafreehtedosti.page.tl
Goku
Admin
Admin
Goku


Number of posts : 184
Age : 30
Location : Pakistan
Registration date : 2008-03-03

the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever   the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 EmptySun Mar 09, 2008 6:51 am

I was recently riding with a friend of mine.

We were coming to a red light, and he shoots right through it. I ask him, "Why'd you do that?" He tells me this is how his brother drives.

We come to another red light, and again, he shoots right through it. I ask him, "Why'd you do that?" Again, he tells me this is how his brother drives.

We come to a green light, and he SLAMS on the brakes. My heart nearly goes into my throat. I shouted at him, "Why do you do that?!"

He replied, "You never know, my brother could be coming the other way."
Back to top Go down
http://www.tafreehtedosti.page.tl
Goku
Admin
Admin
Goku


Number of posts : 184
Age : 30
Location : Pakistan
Registration date : 2008-03-03

the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever   the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 EmptySun Mar 09, 2008 6:52 am

A Sunday School teacher of preschoolers told her students that she wanted each of them to have learned one fact about Jesus by the next Sunday. The following week she asked each child in turn what he or she had learned.

Susie said, "He was born in a manger."

Bobby said, "He threw the money changers out of the temple."

Little Johnny said, "He has a red pickup truck but he doesn't know how to drive it."

Curious, the teacher asked, "And where did you learn that, Johnny?"

"From my Daddy," said Johnny. "Yesterday we were driving down the highway, and this red pickup truck pulled out in front of us and Daddy yelled at him, 'Jesus Christ! Why don't you learn how to drive?'"
Back to top Go down
http://www.tafreehtedosti.page.tl
Goku
Admin
Admin
Goku


Number of posts : 184
Age : 30
Location : Pakistan
Registration date : 2008-03-03

the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever   the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 EmptySun Mar 09, 2008 6:53 am

A very shy guy goes into a nightclub and sees a beautiful woman sitting at the bar. After an hour of gathering up his courage, he finally goes over to her and asks, tentatively, "Um, would you mind if I chatted with you for a while?"

She responds by yelling, at the top of her lungs, "No, I won't sleep with you tonight!" Everyone in the bar is now staring at them. Naturally, the guy is completely embarrassed and he slinks back to his table.

After a few minutes, the woman walks over to him and apologizes. She smiles at him and says, "I'm sorry if I embarrassed you. You see, I'm a graduate student in psychology and I'm studying how people respond to embarrassing situations."

To which he responds, at the top of his lungs, "Two-hundred dollars? What do you mean $200?!
Back to top Go down
http://www.tafreehtedosti.page.tl
Goku
Admin
Admin
Goku


Number of posts : 184
Age : 30
Location : Pakistan
Registration date : 2008-03-03

the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever   the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 EmptySun Mar 09, 2008 6:54 am

At Sydney University, there were four students taking Organic Chemistry. They did so well on all the quizzes, midterms and labs, etc., that each had an "A" so far for the semester. These four friends were so confident with the finals approaching that the weekend before, they decided to go down to Canberra and party with some friends there.

They had a great time. However, after all the hard partying, they slept all day Sunday and didn't make it back to Sydney until early Monday morning - the morning of their final exam! Rather than taking the final then, they decided to find their professor after the exam and explain to him why they missed it.

They explained that they had gone to Canberra to do some research in the ANU (Australian National University) archives for the weekend with the plan to come back in time to study, but, unfortunately, they had a flat tyre on the way back, didn't have a spare, and couldn't get help for a long time. As a result, they only just arrived now!

The professor thought it over and then agreed they could make up their final exam the following day. The guys were elated and relieved. They studied hard that night - all night - and went in the next day at the time the professor had told them.

He placed them in separate rooms and handed each of them a test booklet, (which was out of 100 points) and told them to begin. The first problem was worth five points. It was something simple about free radical formation. Cool, they all thought in their separate rooms, "this is going to be easy."

Each finished the problem and then turned the page. Question 2 (for 95 points): Which tyre?At Sydney University, there were four students taking Organic Chemistry. They did so well on all the quizzes, midterms and labs, etc., that each had an "A" so far for the semester. These four friends were so confident with the finals approaching that the weekend before, they decided to go down to Canberra and party with some friends there.

They had a great time. However, after all the hard partying, they slept all day Sunday and didn't make it back to Sydney until early Monday morning - the morning of their final exam! Rather than taking the final then, they decided to find their professor after the exam and explain to him why they missed it.

They explained that they had gone to Canberra to do some research in the ANU (Australian National University) archives for the weekend with the plan to come back in time to study, but, unfortunately, they had a flat tyre on the way back, didn't have a spare, and couldn't get help for a long time. As a result, they only just arrived now!

The professor thought it over and then agreed they could make up their final exam the following day. The guys were elated and relieved. They studied hard that night - all night - and went in the next day at the time the professor had told them.

He placed them in separate rooms and handed each of them a test booklet, (which was out of 100 points) and told them to begin. The first problem was worth five points. It was something simple about free radical formation. Cool, they all thought in their separate rooms, "this is going to be easy."

Each finished the problem and then turned the page. Question 2 (for 95 points): Which tyre?
Back to top Go down
http://www.tafreehtedosti.page.tl
Goku
Admin
Admin
Goku


Number of posts : 184
Age : 30
Location : Pakistan
Registration date : 2008-03-03

the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever   the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 EmptySun Mar 09, 2008 6:54 am

A Bible study group was discussing the unforeseen possibility of their sudden death. The leader of the discussion said, " We will all die some day, and none of us really know when, but if we did we would all do a better job of preparing ourselves for that inevitable event."

"Everybody shook their heads in agreement with this comment."

Then the leader said to the group, "What would you do if you knew you only had 4 weeks of life remaining before your death, and then the Great Judgment Day?"

A gentleman said, "I would go out into my community and minister the Gospel to those that have not yet accepted the Lord into their lives."

"Very good!", said the group leader, and all the group members agreed, that would be a very good thing to do.

One lady spoke up and said enthusiastically, "I would dedicate all of my remaining time to serving God, my family, my church, and my fellow man with a greater conviction."

"That"s wonderful!" the group leader commented, and all the group members agreed, that would be a very good thing to do.

But one gentleman in the back finally spoke up loudly and said, "I would go to my mother-in-laws house for the 4 weeks."

Everyone was puzzled by this answer, and the group leader ask, "Why your mother-in-law's home?"

"Because that will make it the longest 4 weeks of my life!"
Back to top Go down
http://www.tafreehtedosti.page.tl
Goku
Admin
Admin
Goku


Number of posts : 184
Age : 30
Location : Pakistan
Registration date : 2008-03-03

the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever   the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 EmptySun Mar 09, 2008 6:55 am

Yesterday I was at the local Wal-Mart. Now I was only in there for about 5 minutes and when I came out, there he was - a damn Motorcycle cop writing a parking ticket ...

So, I went to him and said: "Come on Buddy, how about giving a guy a break?"

He simply ignored me and continued writing the ticket.

So, I called him a pencil necked Nazi. He then glared at me and started writing another ticket for having bald tires!

So, I called him a sorry excuse for a human being. He then finished the second ticket and put it on the car with the first. Then he started to write a third ticket!

This went on for about 25 minutes ... the more I abused and hurled insults at him, the more tickets he wrote ...
But hey, I didn't give a damn. My car was parked around the corner ...
Back to top Go down
http://www.tafreehtedosti.page.tl
Goku
Admin
Admin
Goku


Number of posts : 184
Age : 30
Location : Pakistan
Registration date : 2008-03-03

the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever   the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 EmptySun Mar 09, 2008 6:56 am

One day in class the teacher brought a bag full of fruit. "Now class, I'm going to reach into the bag and describe a piece of fruit, and you tell what fruit I'm talking about. Okay, first: it's round, plump and red."

Of course, Johnny raised his hand high, but the teacher, wisely ignored him and picked Deborah, who promptly answered "An apple." The teacher replied, "No Deborah, it's a beet, but I like your thinking." Now for the second. It's soft, fuzzy, and colored red and brownish."

Well, Johnny is hopping up and down in his seat trying to get the teacher to call on him. But she skips him again and calls on Billy. "Is it a peach?" Billy asks. "No, Billy, I'm afraid it's a potato. But I like your thinking," the teacher replies. Here's another: it's long, yellow, and fairly hard."

By now Johnny is about to explode as he waves his hand frantically. The teacher skips him again and calls on Sally. "A banana," she says. "No," the teacher replies, "it's a squash, but I like your thinking."

Johnny is kind of irritated now, so he speaks up loudly. "Hey, I've got one for you teacher; let me put my hand in my pocket. Okay, I've got it: it's round, hard, and it got a head on it." "Johnny!" she cries. "That's disgusting!" "Nope," answers Johnny, "it's a quarter, but I like your thinking!"
Back to top Go down
http://www.tafreehtedosti.page.tl
Goku
Admin
Admin
Goku


Number of posts : 184
Age : 30
Location : Pakistan
Registration date : 2008-03-03

the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever   the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 EmptySun Mar 09, 2008 6:56 am

A businessman walked into a New York City bank and asked for the loan officer. He said he was going to Europe on business for two weeks and needed to borrow $5,000. The loan officer said the bank would need some security for such a loan.

The business man then handed over the keys to a Rolls Royce that was parked on the street in front of the bank. Everything checked out and the loan officer accepted the car as collateral for the loan. An employee then drove the Rolls into the bank's underground garage and parked it there.

Two weeks later the businessman returned, repaid the $5,000 and the interest which came to $15.41.

The loan officer said, "We do appreciate your business and this transaction has worked out very nicely, but we are a bit puzzled. While you were away we checked and found that you are a multimillionaire. What puzzles us is why you would bother to borrow $5,000?"

The business man replied: "Where else in New York City can I park my car for two weeks for fifteen bucks?"
Back to top Go down
http://www.tafreehtedosti.page.tl
Goku
Admin
Admin
Goku


Number of posts : 184
Age : 30
Location : Pakistan
Registration date : 2008-03-03

the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever   the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 EmptySun Mar 09, 2008 6:57 am

The National Transportation Safety Board recently divulged they had covertly funded a project with the US auto makers for the past five years, whereby the auto makers were installing black boxes in four-wheel drive pickup trucks in an effort to determine, in fatal accidents, the circumstances in the last 15 seconds before the crash.

They were surprised to find in 49 of the 50 states the last words of drivers in 61.2 percent of fatal crashes were,

"Oh, Shit!"

Only the state of Alabama was different, where 89.3 percent of the final words were:

"Hold my beer and watch this!"
Back to top Go down
http://www.tafreehtedosti.page.tl
Goku
Admin
Admin
Goku


Number of posts : 184
Age : 30
Location : Pakistan
Registration date : 2008-03-03

the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever   the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 EmptySun Mar 09, 2008 6:57 am

Two car salesmen were sitting at the bar. One complained to the other, "Boy, business sucks. If I don't sell more cars this month, I'm going to lose my fucking ass!"

Too late - he noticed a beautiful blonde, sitting two stools away. Immediately, he offered apologies for his use of bad language.

"That's okay," the blonde replied, "I have a very similar problem ... If I don't sell more ass this month, I'm going to lose my fucking car!"
Back to top Go down
http://www.tafreehtedosti.page.tl
Goku
Admin
Admin
Goku


Number of posts : 184
Age : 30
Location : Pakistan
Registration date : 2008-03-03

the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever   the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 EmptySun Mar 09, 2008 6:59 am

At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated:

"If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving twenty-five dollar cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon."

In response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press release stating (by Mr. Welch himself):

"If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the following characteristics:

1) For no reason whatsoever your car would crash twice a day.
2) Every time they painted new lines on the road you would have to buy a new car.
3) Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason, and you would just accept this, restart and drive on.
4) Occasionally, executing a manoeuvre such as a left turn, would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.
5) Only one person at a time could use the car, unless you bought "Car95" or "CarNT". But then you would have to buy more seats.
6) Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, reliable, five times as fast, and twice as easy to drive, but would only run on five percent of the roads.
7) The oil, water temperature and alternator warning lights would be replaced by a single "general car default" warning light.
Cool New seats would force everyone to have the same size butt.
9) The airbag system would say "Are you sure?" before going off.
10) Occasionally for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key, and grab hold of the radio antenna.
11) GM would also require all car buyers to also purchase a deluxe set of Rand McNally road maps (now a GM subsidiary), even though they neither need them nor want them. Attempting to delete this option would immediately cause the car's performance to diminish by 50% or more. Moreover, GM would become a target for investigation by the Justice Department.
12) Every time GM introduced a new model car buyers would have to learn how to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.
13) You'd press the "start" button to shut off the engine.
Back to top Go down
http://www.tafreehtedosti.page.tl
Goku
Admin
Admin
Goku


Number of posts : 184
Age : 30
Location : Pakistan
Registration date : 2008-03-03

the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever   the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 EmptySun Mar 09, 2008 7:00 am

I went to a couple of car dealerships last week, and the first one I stopped at was Kia, well nothing caught my eye, but the price was right, then I went to a Ford dealer, again nothing really caught my eye, but I looked anyway, then I go to the Chevy dealer, well I see one that I like, the dealer does the once over with me, then he pops the trunk, disapointed, I looked at the dealer and said, "Well, Theres something missing".

The dealer, puzzled asks "What"?

I said "At the Ford dealership I checked out, they had a new pair of shoes in the trunk of every car"!

Smiling the dealer says "That's so they can walk home"!
Back to top Go down
http://www.tafreehtedosti.page.tl
Goku
Admin
Admin
Goku


Number of posts : 184
Age : 30
Location : Pakistan
Registration date : 2008-03-03

the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever   the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 EmptySun Mar 09, 2008 7:00 am

A little boy is in school working on his arithmetic. The teacher says, "Imagine there are 5 black birds sitting on a fence. You pick up your BB gun and shoot one. How many blackbirds are left?"

The little boy thinks for a moment and says, "NONE!" The teacher replies, "None, how do you figure that?" The little boy says, if I shoot one, all the other birds will fly away scared, leaving none on the fence." The teacher replies, "Hmm, not exactly, but I do like the way you think!"

The little boy then says, "Teacher, let me ask you a question. There are 3 women sitting on a park bench eating ice cream cones. One is licking her cone, another is biting it and the third one is sucking it. How can you tell which one of the women is married?"

The teacher ponders the question uncomfortably and then finally replies, "Well, I guess the one sucking her cone."

To which the little boy replies, "Actually, its the one with the wedding ring, but I do like the way YOU think!"
Back to top Go down
http://www.tafreehtedosti.page.tl
Goku
Admin
Admin
Goku


Number of posts : 184
Age : 30
Location : Pakistan
Registration date : 2008-03-03

the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever   the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 EmptySun Mar 09, 2008 7:01 am

On little Larry's first day of first grade, he raised his hand as soon as the teacher came into the room and said, "I don't belong here, I should be in third grade!"

The teacher looked at little Larry's records and told him to please take his seat.

Not five minutes passed when little Larry stood up again and said, "I don't belong here, I should be in the third grade!"

Larry did this a few more times before the principal came along and the teacher explained Larry's problem. The principal and the first grade teacher told little Larry that if he could answer some questions that they could decide in which grade he belonged. Well, they soon discovered that Larry knew all the state capitals and country capitals that the principal could think of.

The teacher suggested they try some biology questions ... "What does a cow have 4 of but a woman has only 2?" asked the teacher.

"Legs!" Larry immediately replied. "What does a man have in his pants that a woman doesn't?" asked the teacher.

"Pockets!" said Larry.

The teacher looked at the principal, who said, "Maybe he should be in third grade, I missed those last two questions!"
Back to top Go down
http://www.tafreehtedosti.page.tl
Goku
Admin
Admin
Goku


Number of posts : 184
Age : 30
Location : Pakistan
Registration date : 2008-03-03

the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever   the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 EmptySun Mar 09, 2008 7:02 am

Teacher: Susie, make a sentence starting with the letter 'I'.

Susie: "I is ..."

Teacher: "No, no, no, don't say 'I is', you say 'I am'".

Susie: "OK, I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."
Back to top Go down
http://www.tafreehtedosti.page.tl
Goku
Admin
Admin
Goku


Number of posts : 184
Age : 30
Location : Pakistan
Registration date : 2008-03-03

the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever   the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 EmptySun Mar 09, 2008 7:03 am

The teacher asked Little Johnny: "How can you prove the earth is round?"

Little Johnny replied: "I can't. Besides, I never said it was."
Back to top Go down
http://www.tafreehtedosti.page.tl
Goku
Admin
Admin
Goku


Number of posts : 184
Age : 30
Location : Pakistan
Registration date : 2008-03-03

the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever   the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 EmptySun Mar 09, 2008 7:03 am

A Sunday School teacher asked her class why Joseph and Mary took Jesus with them to Jerusalem.

Little Johnny replied: "They couldn't get a baby sitter."
Back to top Go down
http://www.tafreehtedosti.page.tl
Goku
Admin
Admin
Goku


Number of posts : 184
Age : 30
Location : Pakistan
Registration date : 2008-03-03

the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever   the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 EmptySun Mar 09, 2008 7:04 am

One day, Little Susie got her monthly bleeding for the first time in her life.

Not quite certain what was happening, and somewhat frightened, she decided to tell Little Johnny. Little Susie dropped her panties and showed Little Johnny what was happening.

Little Johnny's eyes opened wide in amazement. "You know," he said, "I'm not a doctor, but it looks like someone just ripped your balls off!"
Back to top Go down
http://www.tafreehtedosti.page.tl
Goku
Admin
Admin
Goku


Number of posts : 184
Age : 30
Location : Pakistan
Registration date : 2008-03-03

the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever   the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 EmptySun Mar 09, 2008 7:04 am

A third grade teacher always took role call each morning and had the pupils' answer by reciting a short poem.

The first kid sat in the first row was a teachers pet. He stood and said, "My name is Dan, and when I become a man, I would like to go to Japan if I can, and I think I can."

The next kid was a little girl who sat in the middle of the room. She stood up and answered the roll call by stating, "My name is Suzy, and when I become a lady I would like to have a baby ... if I can, and I think I can."

The next on the list was Little Johnny, a smart guy sitting in the back of the room. He stood up and said, "My name is Johnny, and I don't give a darn about Japan but I would like to help Suzy in her plan if I can ... and I think can!"
Back to top Go down
http://www.tafreehtedosti.page.tl
Goku
Admin
Admin
Goku


Number of posts : 184
Age : 30
Location : Pakistan
Registration date : 2008-03-03

the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever   the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 EmptySun Mar 09, 2008 7:05 am

Little Johnny came home from school one day and went by his mom's room. The door was open, so he looked in and saw his mom lying on the bed naked moaning and touching herself saying, "Ooh, I need a man! I need a man!"

The next day, Little Johnny got home from school and saw his mom lying on the bed naked with a naked guy on top of her. So Little Johnny ran to his room, stripped down naked, and started to touch himself, while morning, "Ooh, I need a bike! I need a bike!"
Back to top Go down
http://www.tafreehtedosti.page.tl
Goku
Admin
Admin
Goku


Number of posts : 184
Age : 30
Location : Pakistan
Registration date : 2008-03-03

the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever   the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 EmptySun Mar 09, 2008 7:06 am

Little Johnny came home from school one day and went by his mom's room. The door was open, so he looked in and saw his mom lying on the bed naked moaning and touching herself saying, "Ooh, I need a man! I need a man!"

The next day, Little Johnny got home from school and saw his mom lying on the bed naked with a naked guy on top of her. So Little Johnny ran to his room, stripped down naked, and started to touch himself, while moaning, "Ooh, I need a bike! I need a bike!"
Back to top Go down
http://www.tafreehtedosti.page.tl
Goku
Admin
Admin
Goku


Number of posts : 184
Age : 30
Location : Pakistan
Registration date : 2008-03-03

the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever   the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 EmptySun Mar 09, 2008 7:06 am

Little Johnny was in church with his mom for Sunday Mass when he felt a sudden barf attack impending. "Mom, I think I'm going to throw up!" She told him, "I want you to run outside as fast as you can. Run across the lawn and go behind the bushes. You can throw up behind the bushes and nobody will see you." So Little Johnny hauled ass for the door. Less than a minute later, he returned to his seat next to his mom. He had the look of obvious relief on his young face. "Did you make it all the way to the bushes, Johnny?"

"I didn't have to go that far, mom. Just as I got to the front door, I found a box that had a sign on it: FOR THE SICK."
Back to top Go down
http://www.tafreehtedosti.page.tl
Goku
Admin
Admin
Goku


Number of posts : 184
Age : 30
Location : Pakistan
Registration date : 2008-03-03

the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever   the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 EmptySun Mar 09, 2008 7:07 am

A father asked his son, Little Johnny, if he knew about the birds and the bees.

"I don't want to know!" Little Johnny said, exploding and bursting into tears. Confused, his father asked Little Johnny what was wrong.

"Oh Pop," Johnny sobbed, "for me there was no Santa Claus at age six, no Easter Bunny at seven, and no Tooth Fairy at eight. And if you're telling me now that grown ups don't really have sex, I've got nothing left to believe in!"
Back to top Go down
http://www.tafreehtedosti.page.tl
Sponsored content





the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever   the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever - Page 2 Empty

Back to top Go down
 
the greatest funniest jokes heard seen ever
Back to top 
Page 2 of 4Go to page : Previous  1, 2, 3, 4  Next

Permissions in this forum:You cannot reply to topics in this forum
Maji[N]ation v. 0.5 :: Members Posting Area :: Humour/Jokes-
Jump to:  
Create a forum on Forumotion | ©phpBB | Free forum support | Report an abuse | Forumotion.com